neurotic Iraqi wife

Been extremely busy at work...especially the last few days...its like tasker after tasker...no time to rest...my work partner has gone on R&R and so almost everything is being done by me...As the days are getting closer for us to leaving this place, the desire of getting out of here sooner is getting more...I just wanna see myself out...Im tired, exhausted and drained out....and it is time to leave...I dunno how HUBBY managed 2 years here...I dunno how others managed 2 yrs here...god...Its crazy and unhealthy...

This environment tranforms you into a robot...literally you lead a robotic life....same thing everyday..wake up, go to work..have lunch...go to work...have dinner...go to work....go sleep...wake up....got to work...etc...etc..etc...I see some people keep themselves busy by going to Liberty Pool, or play basketball, or football...many go to the gym...I dont know how they do that...where do they get the energy from....I mean by the time I get back to my room, Im just knackered....


Nothing really special happening, except for saying goodbyes to people who are leaving in a few days time...Our gov leads have done their 4 month rotation, and its time for them to go back...We gave them a small farewell, with a special Iraqi cake (look at it, isnt it amazing??? with the palm trees...we all fell in love with it...we Iraqis are so artistic even in such difficult circumstances, and i have to admit it was really yummy)Im really sad to see them go...Its funny how you tend to get attached to people here...I guess its because you see them everyday, talk to them all the time...have some laughs from time to time....And they are most importantly good people...they touch you here... in the heart...Im definitely gonna keep intouch with them..I want to...such simple people...yet so powerful...so determined...and they are all Air force...Ive mentioned my awe about AF right??? yeah i did..im so in awe....sigh...

I havent packed yet..HUBBY on the otherhand has done all the packing by HIMSELF...unbelievable!!! I had no time....its either that or im just trying to avoid the darn thing....As for news from Baghdad, Im still blocking bad stuff...dont wanna think abt it for now...All I know is that Baghdad is suffering severly from electricity shortage...and summer has already arrived...darn mosquitos are everywhere...I got bitten a few times...there are also teeny weeny flying creatures and boy oh boy do they bite...I have no clue where they come from...You should see us at work, you see hands in the air all the time shooing flies away...its funny....

I ve been told by my family that they found an apartment for us already..Yaaaaay...was so excited...I already have images in my head about furnishing it...I cant wait...it will be the first real place HUBBY and I will live in together...I have convinced him to go for a short vacation back to the US while I go back and fix the apartment...Didnt really do that cuz I want him to relax, oh no...not me...did it so I can be free in choosing the furniture...Lol....it will be my little place...and just the way i like it....ive also decided to buy a dustbin on wheels...HUBBY, 45 yr old man, who does NOT know the benefits or the purpose of a trashbin...he tends to keep his ample coke cans lying on the table, floor, chair, bathroom and anywhere else he finds close...and mind you..the trash bag is just a few cm's away...so umm...I will be having the bin on wheels tied to him...oh together with a laundry basket...since that too he seems to ignore its benefits...Men....

In the past few days almost all our Iraqi colleagues have told us "please dont forget us, once you go and get a job, please try and find one for us" Its sad but true...everyone wants to leave...They say they have had enough of living like the dead...they say we are dead people walking...We have no life, and even if we have one, we dont look forward to waking up and seeing yet another day...Although You see them at work, so passionate in what they do...you can feel their hearts are in it...you can feel the love they have for their projects, yet no one appreciates the hard labour they put in...infact all their efforts are ignored...One colleague of mine who joined as a trainee a yr ago, has now become a project manager, she looked extremely upset the other day...not her usual smiling self...I asked what was the matter...she said, you know, we came to work here with dreams, dreams of becoming something...dreams of getting responsibility...but look at how they treat us...She said Im stuck here taking care of only one project..no chance of promotion, no chance of becoming more than what I am...whats the point she asks???whats the point we risk our lives everyday??? When you see the expats, getting promoted, becoming progam managers..why she asks me??? Dont they believe in us???

All I was able to say, look, dont worry, you are gaining an excellent experience here...dont look at it negatively..at the end of the day...all this is for you..you the Iraqi people...Yes this organisation has mismanaged people, and the program...but one day they will HAVE to give YOU the responsibility you all crave for...just be patient...so You see, this is the reality of things here, of people here....they see themselves as dead people walking...I see them as my heroes...the Heroes of Today...the Heroes of Tomorrow...