neurotic Iraqi wife
May 07, 2005
Road of The Faithless.....
Can someone please tell me that things will get better in Iraq. Can someone please give me guarantees. I dunno, am feeling down, real down,especially after todays bombings. A small kids voice flows from the TV crying"I was standing in the street and then BOOM, a shrapnel hits me in the leg, Ive never hurt anyone" he cries," I never did anything to anyone, why me" These words just tore my heart apart. Tore it to shreds and now I feel empty. WHY children??? WHY the innocent???WHY the criminals are still around??? WHY???
When will this stop??? When will these thugs leave us alone??? Will they ever??? Please tell me that they will, please assure me that no more innocent people are gonna die. I was so hopeful awhile ago, but now am not so sure. I still wanna go to Iraq, no matter what the consequences are I AM GOING, but how can I be of much help if my faith is disappearing slowly. How can I smile when I know that I cant stop these unfair killings. HOW???
Where can people go and know that they will be safe??? Where can a child play with his friends without looking back??? Where can women walk without fear of getting kidnapped, or worse still raped then slaughtered then dumped in the river??? WHERE???
Can you shake me hard and convince me that Iraq is gonna be OK??? Cuz am begging here, I need words, words of wisdom that takes me away from this depression. I need words of Wisdom that can stir my faith up to surface again, I need those so badly now. So badly....
The last few days I heard of so many families leaving Iraq. I met 2 already, and when I ask them about Baghdad, all they say is "Forget Baghdad, Forget Baghdad that once was, Baghdad now is a big wild forest, filled with wild beasts roaming its streets freely, roaming the minds easily, Forget Baghdad" To forget Baghdad is like erasing my whole identity, how can I forget the one thing I yearn for??? How can I forget the dreams, the hopes, the memories??? How can I???
I cant stand myself being like this, but I'm slipping, slipping down the road, the Road of the Faithless.....
When will this stop??? When will these thugs leave us alone??? Will they ever??? Please tell me that they will, please assure me that no more innocent people are gonna die. I was so hopeful awhile ago, but now am not so sure. I still wanna go to Iraq, no matter what the consequences are I AM GOING, but how can I be of much help if my faith is disappearing slowly. How can I smile when I know that I cant stop these unfair killings. HOW???
Where can people go and know that they will be safe??? Where can a child play with his friends without looking back??? Where can women walk without fear of getting kidnapped, or worse still raped then slaughtered then dumped in the river??? WHERE???
Can you shake me hard and convince me that Iraq is gonna be OK??? Cuz am begging here, I need words, words of wisdom that takes me away from this depression. I need words of Wisdom that can stir my faith up to surface again, I need those so badly now. So badly....
The last few days I heard of so many families leaving Iraq. I met 2 already, and when I ask them about Baghdad, all they say is "Forget Baghdad, Forget Baghdad that once was, Baghdad now is a big wild forest, filled with wild beasts roaming its streets freely, roaming the minds easily, Forget Baghdad" To forget Baghdad is like erasing my whole identity, how can I forget the one thing I yearn for??? How can I forget the dreams, the hopes, the memories??? How can I???
I cant stand myself being like this, but I'm slipping, slipping down the road, the Road of the Faithless.....
14 Comments:
Look to Beruit and know that things will get better....eventually.
I suggest that any legitimate government request US contractors to leave immeadiately, as Iraqis are perfectly capable of rebuilding the country. They've done it often enough. The mercenaries need to go.
I understand your joy at Sadam's fall, but I do think the US will need to leave before any government can even pretend to be legitimately independent or to have any real power.
And brace yourself because thing may very well get worse before they get better.
But they will get better.
I'm fairly confident that it'll all take less than 20 years....
If you were not Muslim, I could offer you a big (platonic!) hug; however, it is my understanding that this would not be proper.
The fact is that a wounded organism thrashes the hardest right before it dies; the organizations of terrorist criminals are no different. The Day of Purple showed them that they are not the heroes of the day; they are the scum and the vermin. "Vote and die" the Iraqis were told. The Iraqis promptly declared themselves to be "suicide voters" and headed off to the polls.
More innocents and yes, more children, will get hurt. It is horrible, and I wish that it would not be so, but it will. However, the only true defeat comes if your people stop blaming the terrorist criminals and start blaming anyone else.
Your country will get through this! Perhaps you can sit in silence for 10 minutes, a couple of times a day, and let your soul focus on an end to the violence and hatred? (Many call it "meditation".) I believe it will do some good for the world, and I also believe it will do some good for you. You feel helpless in the face of evil right now, and you do not like that. So at least lend the energy of your belief to the ideal of peace, freedom and justice.
Watch this again; it might cheer you up.
NIW,
I know how you are feeling because I had the same feelings when I saw the picture of that soldier holding the bleeding little kid...but honey we have to remain strong and have faith...Iraqis are the strongest people I know...anyone who can survive 30 years under the rule of the world's worst tyrannt and murderer and STILL have a sense of humor, and be able to make jokes must be a stong person...Iraqis inside Iraq need us their brothers and sisters outside of Iraq to lend them support and encouragement...they need to know that we are with them every step of the way...and for that reason we can't lose hope and we can't become pessimists because they are counting on us back home!!!
Dear Sweet Neurotica,
You are a very strong person. You have such a big heart. You are good and wise beyond your years. You have desire and you have ambition for yourself and for the good of your country.
Hubby is strong and will do all in his power to comfort and protect you. He will be a good friend to you in a very difficult situation. In the middle of despair, he will find a way to make you smile.
Don't hesitate to look to wise and good people for support.
And don't forget that you are, in your heart-of-hearts, a real tiger. Proud and self-contained and ready to fight and protect your self, your loved ones and your country.
Love, Tilli
It has been just over 2 years since the invasion and direct combat against saddams troops that would fight. There was no Iraqi government, most of the Iraqi military was disbanned. There were few police, there was no organization, no pay for workers, hardly any electricity and not much running water. Schools and business places were closed, hospitals could barely function. there was not much of anything. Despite the terrorist attacks, things are being rebuilt and there is now an Iraqi government that was elected. there are more policemen than ever and the Iraqi army is being rebuilt and has been fighting the terrorists. Do not give up hope. That is the worst thing you can do and it is exactly what the terrorists want you to do. That is why they are attacking civilians and killing children - the only way they can win is if people quit hoping. You had no hope under saddam, now you do.
It's going to be okay:
"When there is no lead in the air, there is hope"
Sissy
Ma'am,
You yourself have said why your country will win. What are you doing? All the carnage, the fear, the terror, and you are going to the heart of it all. As long as there are people in Iraq like you, I will not worry over the long term. Short term, it is not pretty.
I would love one day to meet you and your hubby (and any 'munchkins'), in my book you folks are the best. We all think of you.
Good luck.
Dave Glaspell
Honolulu HI
glaspelld001@hawaii.rr.com
All the comments were good except for the idiot who said look at beirut. LOOK AT BEIRUT? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT? IT TOOK BEIRUT 15 YEARS TO END THEIR WAR!!! Please don't say LOOK AT BEIRUT, if Iraq winds up like Beirut then theres another 13+ years of this shit.
I'm sorry you are feeling so down and it is understandable. And it is expected that it is not all rosy - it is hard and painful.
Losing is not an option. It will not be allowed.
When you are feeling like it is hopeless then write about it. I will tell you it is not hopeless but it is hard and painful.
Am feeling much better thanx to all of your words and patience with me. Ive read that the forces have scaled up their offensive http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050510/ap_on_re_mi_ea/iraq and I wish they continue to do so until they eradicate every single criminal in Iraq.
Littlewhy, you are right we cant lose,Brian Iraqis dont flee, we fight, and if it comes to that Ill fight those barbaric animals until my death. Chris, you see, the ignorant can only blame others for their mistakes. read http://iraqiexpat.blogspot.com/2005/05/its-americas-fault.html
J its ok, can I get my hug now???B4 I even read ur comment I infact did watch the video of the Iraqi elections, and yes it made my heart flutter again, and my soul smile,Thanx...Ahmad,I know, we cant afford to lose,not this time,cant add more to that.Nancy,maybe we the ones outside are much weaker than our fellow Iraqis inside.Maybe we need their strength,their perseverence, their resilience so we can go on, dont u think???
Thanx Rob,thanx for your kind words.
Tilli its people like you and the other commenters that give me words of wisdom which help me go on and Im ever so grateful....Goesh,itsa phase I go thru, and no I cant give up hope, you are right, not now, not ever. Sissy, read your article, read MajorK's post, and yes finally the light under the tunnel is flickering with life again....
Dave, In my dreams, Iraq is a paradise, I guess thats my dreams for the long term.In my nightmares,Iraq is a hell hole, I guess thats the short term and thankGod it will only be short term,butthe question is how short is short???
Hmm, now anon, pls dont be so rude, infact Ill be happy if Iraq becomes like Beirut. 13 years thats even more hopeful than what many Iraqis say, and Inshallah it will be much less than that....Monica,losing is not an option and thats why I woke up today hopeful, hopeful that even if tom will be dark and cold, I know one day the sun WILL shine...Thanx to all of you....
Don't worry!! Iraq is going to win, we already ARE winning. Remember that the Nazis launched the bloodiest battles of the war in late 1944, right before they were utterly destroyed. In every war the worst battles are right before the end, the enemy terrorists are throwing everything that they have. But now they have to use someone else to detonate the suiciders, because they don't know they are going to be killed! they are using idiots to transport the bombs and then using cell phones to blow them up- because they have been weakened. we are going to catch Zarqawi soon, we are killing his men and leaders every day. We just killed 150 terrorists in the last week near Syria- as long as you don't give up we will win! 97% of the Iraqi people are on OUR good side against 3% of the terrorists. You know that things are bad now, but Iraq has been through worse, humanity has been through worse. You must be strong and unbreakable- we all are fighting now and we can not be defeated because the terrorists offer nothing but death while we offer hope. So keep hope!!
Everytime the murderers make a demand realize that it is because they are hurting. Yesterday they demanding that the US stop with the western offensive. it's good to know they are hurting, and it's sad to know that their most likely victims are the weak and unprotected. Go and be a pillar for the weak. cry when you need to but never loose heart.
I can't tell you when things will get better. I can't ask you to forgive. I can only ask you to try to understand. On my blog. Starting here.
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