neurotic Iraqi wife

HUBBY had lived the past 25 years of his life in the States. He had lost all contact with his childhood friends and grew up in an environment that was devoid of any Iraqi contacts except for his family ofcourse. He used to tell me how much he missed being around Iraqis and especially his yearning to listening to the Iraqi language. HUBBY and I met by sheer coincidence, something that neither of us envisaged or even imagined, I guess Mr Cupid, was wearing pretty strong glasses and aimed his arrow right on target, poor HUBBY, hehe...

When we first met, he would keep asking me if I knew so and so, and I would scream "Oh my God, they are very close family friends" and then he would go on and ask me about so and so and so and so, and surprisingly enough, I knew all of them, and if I hadnt met some in person, I would have heard off them, naturally we both got excited that really what a small world this is. I mean here I am in one end of the globe and there he is at the other end, yet we know so many people in common. But this shouldnt come as a surprise, cuz in Iraq, especially in the old times, everyone knew everyone else. You just mention the family name, and thats it. Nowadays though there are families that rose up with Saddam's regime, you know nothing of their background or where they came from, these are I guess the "noveux riche".

In anycase, after reminiscing his childhood with me, HUBBY turned out to be quite a guy in his teens. Him and his 3 brothers were so famous in the "ILWIYA CLUB" for their football playing. HUBBY was an Arsenal fan, and not just any fan, but he was crazy about them. When he would tell me the stories about how popular they were, and how everyone liked them, I would just say "yeah yeah", sarcastically ofcourse, for I really wasnt from their generation and I didnt get to live these days, since probably I was still in my diapers,lol(sorry HUBBY, but I am donkey years younger than you)... But then after I got married, people would come and ask me HUBBY's name, and just the mention of it, they would go loony, jump with excitement, not believing their ears. Every single person would say" OMG, doesnt he have 3 brothers? wasnt he an Arsenal fan? OMG they were the most popular guys around, and he was our Idol". Without any exxageration, this is exactly what everysingle person would say about HUBBY. And only then would you see me having the proudest smile ever and I would say "yes siree thats my HUBBY".

On one occassion, when HUBBY came over here to meet "the parents" he had coincidentally met with an Iraqi man who happened to be the husband of HUBBY's first childhood crush,lol.... And ofcourse I knew the lady, she is one of my sisters close friends. I couldnt believe it. He had told me, how they had their first dance together when they were 12,OMG, isnt that cute(I have one of those smiles now on my face).

He would keep asking me about how she looks now and me being me, lol, I had told him " tsk tsk tsk HUBBY, I dont advice you to even check her out, the poor thing had gained so much weight, and she has so much white hair she looks like a granny". I watched HUBBY's reaction and I could tell he was shocked to his core. He said stammering"Bbbbbbut, ssssshhhheeee was sssssooooo ccccuuuute, ssssshhheeee wwwaaaassss bllllooooonnnndeee annndddd hhhhaaaaddd ccccoloured eyes, and and and ssssshhhheeee waaasss ssssooooo ssslllliiiiimmmm" I said "Oh HUBBY darling that was when you guys were 12, I mean cmon, the woman is married has 2 grown up kids now, and seriously if you see her you will have a nightmare"hehe,loooooooooooool, OMG, poor HUBBY. He kept asking me if I was talking about the same girl, I said"HUBBY, believe me, I know her, she is my sister's close friend". I know I know that was very mean. After my false revelations he stop mentioning the poor woman's name.

Just yesterday Mrs CRUSH came over, and I have to admit she really is one of the nicest ladies I have met. She is so easy going with an amazing sense of humour, you sit with her for 2 minutes and thats it you will end up on the floor from laughter. She has such a charming persona. After I got married and ofcourse she had heard to who, she too couldnt believe her ears. I immediately told her "BTW, I know that you guys were childhood sweethearts". She blushed and said "God that was such a long time ago, is he still the same?" LOL, now I wasnt gonna say anything bad about HUBBY, I just told her well I aint sure how he was when he was 12 cuz I wasnt even born yet, but I assure you that he is still charming, and he still remembers you"(add a wink here). Immediately she said"Please when he comes here we gotto meet, all his class mates would love to see him again" Then she smiled, and said"My God, you took me 30 years back, wowwww, how times passes so fast, they were the best years in our lives". I looked naughtily and said" Oh defintely he would love to see you guys, especially you, after telling him that you havent changed abit"hehe. Poor Mrs CRUSH.

So yesterday, Mrs CRUSH comes upto me and says "I just saw your wedding pictures, and that man is NOT the guy I remember, he looks soooo different, he has aged!!!!He used to be blonde and now he has grey hairs, umm does he still have blue eyes?" I laughed my headoff, I told her" I never heard in my whole life that eyes change with age, so yes he still has blue eyes, and he hasnt aged that much, I mean cmon, the last time you saw him was 25 years ago, ofcourse he has changed since then" She looked shocked and said, wowwww, Im stunned, he just looks so different. After listening to these words, I couldnt wait to relay the message back to HUBBY,lol.

When he called me this morning, I told him Mrs CRUSH's exact words, the poor thing, I think it felt like he was hit by a baseball bat. Then I told him, that it will be nice to meet up with her, he immediately replied"Oh no, I'd rather not, let me keep the cute image I have of her I dont wanna be disappointed, and I dont want HER to be disappointed as well". I guess that is the end of that SAGA....

I had mentioned in one of my previous posts how its customery when a girl gets married the immediate natural thing that should take place is pregnancy. I swear they think people are like rabbits, you know, just do the do and hey prestooooo, magically a dozen babies appear. So yesterday I had the comments come at me left, right and center,UUGHHHHHH "oooooooooh congratulations, so cmon isnt there anything on the way(and here they start gesturing with their hands moving above their tummies). Umm hellooooo I aint dumb, you dont have to show me where babies come from, geez. But thank God I had my answer ready "Well how do you expect me getting pregnant(and here I do the same and mimick their gestures) when I have only spent 13 days with HUBBY since we got married" I guess that answer would just shut them up, Thank God for that.

That damn bloody "window" (women would know exactly what Im talkin about here) would never come at the right time. I aint gonna kill myself, but it would be nice if it would work this time around. I even have a name queued up, a name, that I have kept all for myself, havent heard anyone name their daughter this name, and it has a beautiful meaning. I dont want anyone to snatch it from me, thats why I cant wait, cant wait for that daughter to come along and shower me with her cheekiness, for Ill make sure she will be the cheekiest kid around, and I will make sure she will give HUBBY the hardest time of his life, hehe.....

But I guess for now I will just have to settle for my favourate sweets, JELLY BABIES Anyone????