neurotic Iraqi wife
July 03, 2005
Date Trees of the Euphrates...
Im so sorry for not writing for so long. Things have been pretty hectic here. Work is never ending and by the time Im done Im too knackered to do anything. I so feel out of touch with the outside world, and btw, although Im here in Baghdad I still get my news from the net since we arent allowed to leave the vicinity of the Green Zone. The only thing that makes me know Im really here are the date trees...They are the only sense of Iraqism in the Green Zone...
Im trying to convince HUBBY to sneak out, just for an hour, just to see how things are beyond the T walls....But HUBBY aint having it, says its too risky. I guess I will have to keep on trying and maybe learn some new seducing tactics inorder to get my way....
Its been 5 weeks since Ive been here, and boy oh boy you get to learn so many things. Maybe learn is not the right word, the magic word is actually "Appreciate". 2 or 3 weeks ago water supplies were pretty scarce here in the GZ. We were told to use water only if necessary. The first day was a bugger, the second day you tend to realise that this is a normal way of living for Iraqis. By the third day, you dont even give a damn if you stink, you just make the best out of it by using bottled water to wash up or whatever water is available.
As for insects and cockroaches, they used to make me scream so loud and jump out of my seat. The other day, as we were getting ready for bed, I saw one on the wall, that jumped onto my duvet. Squashed it and went to bed, didnt spend a single thought over it. Do you change when you are here????You sure do. You become accepting to many things you never thought you could tolerate in normal circumstances. And the only reason for this tolerance is the fact that you cant do much about it anyway....
Ok now when it comes to toilets ahem ahem. HUBBY and I tend to go to this place where they have the infamous shredded lamb that HUBBY lived on before I got here. The Iraqi name for that dish is Gus. Well that place is actually off limits to us cuz of the so called "danger" associated with Iraqi food restaurants, but WE ARE IRAQIES and so we dont mind going there. Its actually in the GZ so we really aint violating any rules. In anycse, that particular day we left in such a haste that I forgot to go to the loo. By the time we reached there, my bladder was exploding. I asked HUBBY if there was a womens toilet, he looked at me in a cheeky way and said no Hon, but there is a toilet and I dont advice you to see it. I tried to keep it in but couldnt anymore. Said to HUBBY pls I gotto go. As we went outside the restaurant, HUBBY pointed at a trailer.I looked there were men washing up. I waited until they were done, as I entered, OMG,OMG flies, flies everywhere and the place stank. I went in so quick and emptied my bladder in less than 10 seconds making sure my mouth is sealed shut and my, sry, butt cheeks are as close together as possible as not to allow the flies in. Now that was one hell of an experience....
Work wise, Im loving it. Im learning about things I never dreamt I would. But inside politics plays quite abit here. I believe its normal in every work place. But I have to tell you about this Iraqi lady. She kills me. She works with HUBBY and loves to boss people around. The first 2 weeks here was hell since HUBBY and I would argue about her all the time. He keeps telling me she is nice, and I aint disputing this, but she tends to interfere in every single thing we do. If we wanna go have dinner she comes along, if we are going for a smoke she comes along, we moved to new digs she became our neighbour, and at one point HUBBY would refer to her and him as we!!!!HELLLOOOOOOOO. He would be like, we are going to go to bla bla you wanna come???Umm hell no HUBBY, its supposed to be me and you as "we", not the other way. I think its gonna take a long time for him to realise that he aint alone no more. I had reached a point of breakdown 2 weeks ago, it became really unbareable and I missed home. I missed the unconditional affection.... But hey am ok now, got over it or trying to....
What else can I tell you??? Hmm, yeah theres this one thing which I kinda find very very upsetting. Its the way people distinct Iraqis who live here by calling them Local Nationals, and us who came from outside "Expats". I mean yeah the meanings are spot on, but the distinctions are made pretty obvious by being treated differently. Im Iraqi yet I hold a UK passport therefore Im treated with respect....I walk past checkpoints and all they do is look at the multiple ID's we all tend to carry with us and let us go. Yet the "Local Nationals" are searched everysingle time they go and come in. I know its a security issue, but being Iraqi myself I have very mixed feelings. I cant stand it when there's a huge queue of my people in this scorching heat and there I am prancing through. I tend to lower my head low, and walk real fast.
They say theres gonna be a transitional period where Iraqi people will take over some of the organisations. They are the ones that are getting trained here. But when I talk to them theres this slight contempt, they say we stopped believing what they tell us until we see it in our eyes. A few smile at me and tell me, "you dont have to worry, you are not a Local National, you are an expat, if you wanna leave this place you can do it anytime, but WE, WE are stuck here....Although my work is more onthe finance side, and not construction, I try my best to make people lives better by bridging the gap between us and by correcting their conception of us "expats" being more important than them. Cuz that is exactly how they feel.
Ive been blabbing along, and I can barely see what I have been writing since Ive shrunk the window to a real small size....If I didnt make sense then please do excuse me. I apologize, am writing so fast....
I guess I better go now, I better go and walk past the Date trees, The Date trees of the Euphrates.....
Im trying to convince HUBBY to sneak out, just for an hour, just to see how things are beyond the T walls....But HUBBY aint having it, says its too risky. I guess I will have to keep on trying and maybe learn some new seducing tactics inorder to get my way....
Its been 5 weeks since Ive been here, and boy oh boy you get to learn so many things. Maybe learn is not the right word, the magic word is actually "Appreciate". 2 or 3 weeks ago water supplies were pretty scarce here in the GZ. We were told to use water only if necessary. The first day was a bugger, the second day you tend to realise that this is a normal way of living for Iraqis. By the third day, you dont even give a damn if you stink, you just make the best out of it by using bottled water to wash up or whatever water is available.
As for insects and cockroaches, they used to make me scream so loud and jump out of my seat. The other day, as we were getting ready for bed, I saw one on the wall, that jumped onto my duvet. Squashed it and went to bed, didnt spend a single thought over it. Do you change when you are here????You sure do. You become accepting to many things you never thought you could tolerate in normal circumstances. And the only reason for this tolerance is the fact that you cant do much about it anyway....
Ok now when it comes to toilets ahem ahem. HUBBY and I tend to go to this place where they have the infamous shredded lamb that HUBBY lived on before I got here. The Iraqi name for that dish is Gus. Well that place is actually off limits to us cuz of the so called "danger" associated with Iraqi food restaurants, but WE ARE IRAQIES and so we dont mind going there. Its actually in the GZ so we really aint violating any rules. In anycse, that particular day we left in such a haste that I forgot to go to the loo. By the time we reached there, my bladder was exploding. I asked HUBBY if there was a womens toilet, he looked at me in a cheeky way and said no Hon, but there is a toilet and I dont advice you to see it. I tried to keep it in but couldnt anymore. Said to HUBBY pls I gotto go. As we went outside the restaurant, HUBBY pointed at a trailer.I looked there were men washing up. I waited until they were done, as I entered, OMG,OMG flies, flies everywhere and the place stank. I went in so quick and emptied my bladder in less than 10 seconds making sure my mouth is sealed shut and my, sry, butt cheeks are as close together as possible as not to allow the flies in. Now that was one hell of an experience....
Work wise, Im loving it. Im learning about things I never dreamt I would. But inside politics plays quite abit here. I believe its normal in every work place. But I have to tell you about this Iraqi lady. She kills me. She works with HUBBY and loves to boss people around. The first 2 weeks here was hell since HUBBY and I would argue about her all the time. He keeps telling me she is nice, and I aint disputing this, but she tends to interfere in every single thing we do. If we wanna go have dinner she comes along, if we are going for a smoke she comes along, we moved to new digs she became our neighbour, and at one point HUBBY would refer to her and him as we!!!!HELLLOOOOOOOO. He would be like, we are going to go to bla bla you wanna come???Umm hell no HUBBY, its supposed to be me and you as "we", not the other way. I think its gonna take a long time for him to realise that he aint alone no more. I had reached a point of breakdown 2 weeks ago, it became really unbareable and I missed home. I missed the unconditional affection.... But hey am ok now, got over it or trying to....
What else can I tell you??? Hmm, yeah theres this one thing which I kinda find very very upsetting. Its the way people distinct Iraqis who live here by calling them Local Nationals, and us who came from outside "Expats". I mean yeah the meanings are spot on, but the distinctions are made pretty obvious by being treated differently. Im Iraqi yet I hold a UK passport therefore Im treated with respect....I walk past checkpoints and all they do is look at the multiple ID's we all tend to carry with us and let us go. Yet the "Local Nationals" are searched everysingle time they go and come in. I know its a security issue, but being Iraqi myself I have very mixed feelings. I cant stand it when there's a huge queue of my people in this scorching heat and there I am prancing through. I tend to lower my head low, and walk real fast.
They say theres gonna be a transitional period where Iraqi people will take over some of the organisations. They are the ones that are getting trained here. But when I talk to them theres this slight contempt, they say we stopped believing what they tell us until we see it in our eyes. A few smile at me and tell me, "you dont have to worry, you are not a Local National, you are an expat, if you wanna leave this place you can do it anytime, but WE, WE are stuck here....Although my work is more onthe finance side, and not construction, I try my best to make people lives better by bridging the gap between us and by correcting their conception of us "expats" being more important than them. Cuz that is exactly how they feel.
Ive been blabbing along, and I can barely see what I have been writing since Ive shrunk the window to a real small size....If I didnt make sense then please do excuse me. I apologize, am writing so fast....
I guess I better go now, I better go and walk past the Date trees, The Date trees of the Euphrates.....
27 Comments:
glad you are ok
It's good to hear that you are well. Day by day, little by little; that's how to get by in this heat. Stay safe!
Kenjiro
So happy to see your post and know you and hubby are both alright.
How old is this other Iraqi lady, and is she married? It rather sounds like she's very lonely, or she has a crush on your hubby, or both. Maybe you need to fix her up with someone, so she isn't stuck like glue to you all the time.
Shari
All of the Iraqi people who
are working and trying to
give the new Iraqi government a chance should be treated with great respect.
I would imagine that those who live in the GZ are not searched
as much as those that live outside
the GZ and return each day.
Perhaps this is the determining factor.
Anyhow all you can do is keep working toward building the new Iraq its will be a slow process.
I was wondering is the new American embassy under construction yet ???
I was b*tching to a friend today about my boyfriend, about something he did, or rather didn't. And then I said, well, if I am b*tching about that, it must mean that I am not heartsick with worry about his well-being.
So it warmed my heart when I read about your dh and the "other woman"...lol. It brings a little normalcy into a climate where normalcy has not yet been achieved. Good to hear from you!
You are a jewel, dear Neurotica.
Remarkable, remarkable girl.
We luv u,
Tilli
NIW,
Glad to know you're ok.
When you started talking about the restaurant toilet, I knew where that story was going :-)
I love reading your posts thank you so much!!!
Add me to the list of "glad you're okay!"
I like your posts. I like your style. I like your spirit.
Hang in there. You're gonna do just fine.
Oh just keep right on "Babbling" I live for each and every word. It's wonderful to hear about regular stuff going on inside the GZ.
XOXO,
Pebble
Thank God you're okay, kiddo. Not to worry, there's potties like tha tin New Orleans .especially during Carnival
E-mail coming.
LOL,
Reading everyones comments. Like them I am happy to hear news from afar, and that you are ok! Till next time.
Babble is a good and wonderful thing. When you are free you can babble --- I'm glad that you can have at least a small sense of that freedom even if it exists in the GZ.
I would also think that the security clearance involves you staying in the GZ on a permanent basis - and not you being an ex-pat.
Thank you for the update!
Dear Lady NIW:
first: be careful. Do NOT leave the GZ. you don't know the bliss you're in.
at least you have running water, electricity, and some measure of safety.
you cannot possibly compare living situations inside to those outside.
my friend, do not take me as an antagonist, just as someone experiencing all those bad things first hand.
about that expat vs. local thing,
first, consider that most Iraqis HERE have an extreme case of xenophobia.
first they look at the outsider with awe and amazement, "oh how good-beautiful-smart he/she is" then, comes the back stabbing: "that FOREIGNER, if he didnt have a FORIEGN passport, he wouldnt get so much attention" which is true in most cases here in iraq!
so, all i say is, give it some time before you decide to venture out into the real world.
Hubby is right in refusing.
we don't want to see you on tv ;)
btw: heard about what the animals did in london?
poor londoners. from Olympic happiness to terrorist hell.
c ya. (don't take it too literally!)
You have to learn to pee standing up!
Never know in an emergency.
God Bless.
Hello neurotic how are you doing??
First of all, I noted your blog a few weeks ago and I liked it,even linked to it, but you had stopped blogging so I didn't email or comment.
Second and more important, your Hubby is right not to go outside of the GZ, do you know why, because actually Iraqis working with the US are in more danger than the US soldiers themselves. It is true, becuase don't think for a moment that your identity is hidden, word gets out, and a second reason is that your are not protected by hummers or tanks, stay inside and you can be sure you'll get a chance to see what is outside, when it is better.
By the way, how are you doing with the dust storms in Baghdad this week.??
Hey NIW, nice to read a post from you!
My condolences for the families of Iraq, the latest savagery is as senseless as the rest, as if bombing people into submission will work...
Anyone who would directly target children is evil in heart and thought.
Yes I'd be taking hubby's advise as to sitting tight for now. Things must be moving painfully slow for Iraqis as well.
You sound like you had the same experience that I had with a public washroom in Athens, Greece...I'll say no more, except to say I have a new respect for bladder capacity.
You are right though; As you live there you learn to adapt pretty quick.
Take care NIW!
I'm glad to hear you and hubby are together again. Take care of yourself and be safe.
I just found your blog -- I'm so glad I found it. I really enjoy reading your posts.
hi, im also iraqi but ive never had the chance to visit there...so i guess id be going thro the same situations when i actually do get the chance, great blog, funny and interesting...am gonna add a link to it, hope you dont mind
It's really uplifting to find people like you going back to their country, helping rebuild, and get it back on it's feet after so many years of tyranny and strife.
I really respect that, it's even more impressive that you're a newly wed and are starting a new life with your husband in baghdad. Very inspiring stuff.
Keep it up .. and keep safe.. will look forward to your next post. ;)
Hey you! Iraqi Wife! Are you OK? I miss your comments. Tell us anything you want. Remember, a lot of us are stupid Americans, so everything is always news to us.
Have you bumped into the Prime Minister al Jafar in the Green Zone yet?
I really feel so badly for you. I was in Iraq for 12 months with the US Army, and established some great relationships with the Iraqi people. Sadly, I whole heartedly agree with all your comments in this last post, and it is devestating to my mind to think that after all this, the hope is lost and Iraq may now be worse off than it was before. I am praying for everyone and trying my hardest to help out as I can.
Mashallah
So many blogs and only 10 numbers to rate them. I'll have to give you a 8 because you have good content.
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being in Iraq is not like what you expected specially when you're a female.
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