neurotic Iraqi wife

That was one helluva of a trip,I enjoyed it big time. Went to Amman to meet up with HUBBY(who was coming from Baghdad) then off to Amsterdam for 4 days, took a day trip via the train to Brussels and off to Stockholm for 5 days, then back to Amman for the dreaded farewell. What can I say, Im starting to understand HUBBY more and although I used to moan and complain for him not being around, I finally came to realise how important his work is. Darn I sound boring no???

Before I divulge into the subject of HUBBY, I would like to say Thanx Tilli for your tips about Amsterdam. We would go into the internet cafe there and check out our emails (since HUBBY cant go a day without checking his). And your tips were great. I really loved Amsterdam, infact I enjoyed it more than Stockholm. I think the weather played a big part. Our a**** literally froze in Sweden. I felt like a duck walking with all the layers of clothings and every hour we stop at a cafe to have my dosage of cafe latte to keep me warm while dearest HUBBY would have his dosage of Pepsi with alotta ice,hmmm, opposites do attract no?

Amsterdam was interesting except for the aroma of those "cigarettes" which after a while makes you dizzy. Umm and yes I did try it, and HATED IT. We entered into one of those coffee houses and before I even ask for my caffe late we were presented with a menu. Umm a menu for drugs???Geez,that was a first. HUBBY and I looked at each other and we both had cheeky smiles on our faces. Before we even reach Amsterdam, HUBBY had given me a huge lecture about drugs and how I shouldnt even dream of trying them out bla bla bla and that if I even think of it he will be very upset with me...Hmmm great lecture, but umm, didnt last for long,hehe. So there we were looking at the menues if it was some chinese code we are trying to break.

We didnt wanna seem unknowledgable but at the same time we didnt wanna kill ourselves. So we asked questions and told the waitress we are infact first timers and we just wanna try it out. She explained the many different types and told us that maybe its better if we buy the ready made one. Which we did. I opened the plastic wrap so carefully as if it was something of great value. Lit it up, took a drag while HUBBY is holding my hands. Didnt feel nothing. Infact the taste was yuck. Took a few more drags and I felt sick. HUBBY kept asking if I was ok, and that I shouldnt over do it. It was his turn, he took a few drags all at once and started coughing his head off. I swear we looked like 2 kids trying a cigarette for the first time behind our parents backs. Half an hour later I wanted to sleep, my head felt heavy and I felt nauseous. We went outside and there it was the uncontrollable laughter, Ijust couldnt stop myself. Then I began to cry thinking Shit Icant control myself. Then I laugh again, then I cry. It was AWFUL. Never again will I smoke that s**t. HUBBY was sooooooo worried he was dragging me like a child back to the hotel. God what an experience.

Ofcourse checked out the "Red Light District". Hmm, what can I say? As a woman I probably should have found it vulgar, but I didnt. Infact I wasnt amused nor disgusted, just took it as it is. The only thing I loved were the red neon lights, that was all that I found cute in the whole experience. We took a sightseeing boat trip and I fell in love with one houseboat. As for the food, well, I guess its very touristic. HUBBY was yet again looking for Iraqi food there and his quest for real arabic food was disappointing.

Stockholm on the other hand was fffrrrreeeeezing. The lakes had turned into a skiing area, and the temperature was below zero, one night it actually reached -22 C. My hands and ears would turn numb after a while. HUBBY's moustache turned icy everytime we go out, he really looked funny. We would sit and dream of sandy beaches and warm weather,lol. But I still enjoyed it, enjoyed the snow, and had a few snow fights, just like the movies. It was fun. Most of the museums we wanted to go to were closed, so we ended up walking through the Old town and the shopping streets. The best Swedish food we had was in a restaurant called the Gondolen, were you sit and see a beautiful panorama of Stockholm. Although it was pretty expensive, it was well worth it. The Herring was yummy, and so was the Salmon. The waiters were extremely friendly and very helpful.

Its funny cuz whenever we were asked our nationalities and we would tell them Iraqis, you see a look of curiousity on their faces. Then the normal question "So how is it now? Is it really better after Saddam?". It was only in Brussels where one old man, a waiter, said that he believes Saddam was the only solution to Iraq and that the war was wrong. HUBBY and I both jumped at the statement, saying that its true that the post war was planned in a haste, but never do we see Saddam as a solution. Saddam was a tyrant and killed his own people. Yes the situation aint rosy now, but it never was rosy then either. He mumbled and said but Saddam kept a grip on those insurgents. I asked him and who do you think are the insurgents now???They are but Saddam loyalists and terrorists from neighbouring countries. They are people who dont wantto see a democratic Iraq. I left it at that since we were pretty starving and didnt want our food to have spit on it, eeewwww.

As for the Iraqis we encountered on our trip, they werent that many, but almost all of them believe that Iraq will improve yet they dont see themselves going back. Yes they do miss it, but they have gotten accustomed to their lives and they dont see how they can adapt. Everytime someone says that I nudge HUBBY and mouth to him "You see". But now, I guess I came to realise how much this is important for HUBBY. Yes I mean I always knew it was but my insecurities always used to kick in and I would presume HUBBY wants to stay there cuz he doesnt love me enough. I know I know, a childish way of looking at it, but as you already know I was newly married when he left, and I kinda wanted to live that dream of "married" life. But there are dreams, and there are other dreams.

Right at the start of the trip I started asking HUBBY questions, like the norm, when are we gonna settle, why is he being selfish, bla bla bla. I became upset when he told me that he would like to renew his contract, which was supposed to end this May. I freaked out, and I began to cry. Took it really personally, but then he took hold of my arms and took me where his laptop was. Told me "READ". I read his emails, hewould get 30 emails aday regarding work. I read and read and I came to the conclusion that HUBBY is really making a difference. He then told me that he wants me there with him. Something I never thought he wanted. My parents will probably give me hell, but Im still gonna try and apply for jobs in Iraq. Although I did get disappointed a few times when the requirements is a US citizenship, something I dont have. HUBBY keeps telling me to work on my green card application but I havent done anything about it yet. I guess we will have to wait and see.

Im back to my old routine now. I still am working on this orphanage project in Iraq. My other job has ended just before I left on vacation, and am back to my quest of finding something in Iraq. Maybe it will happen, maybe it wont, no one knows, but surely my countdown now is gonna be that day, the day where HUBBY will say "Here I am, Im all yours now" Another 9 months and that day will hopefully be here...... He promised and I believe him. So 9 months is where our life begins, My Life, His Life, Our Life.....

PS: I just wanna clarify something, unfortunately I aint pregnant YET. Would love to very much, but the time hasnt come, but Mike from Morrocco thanx for your concern. A great article I must admit.